Sugasm 36

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Meat and Veg

...so to speak.

I've had a few discussions (via email) over the last few days with some readers of my stories. That's not unusual. What is strange is that a number of them seemed to cover the same ground.

Girls, for some reason, like to tell me things. I'm happy about that. I like to listen. :-)

I'm also very quiet about what I hear. I might tell you some details, but never enough that you could even try to work out where the details come from. Anyway, it's like this.

Lots of ladies/girls/women like to masturbate. No surprise there, thankfully. Hell, I encourage them. Lots of them do it different ways, but just of late, I've had a lot of people tell me how they like to masturbate with something foreign pushed firmly inside them.

Not a vibrator, or a dildo as such. Not a hairbrush, or anything like that. But stick with that shape, and visit the produce section. Yeah, that's it. Vegetables.

Why oh why are girls putting veges where the meat usually goes? :-)

Is it an underground movement? A group of unbearably frustrated females banding together to get group orgasm? it seems not, because generally speaking they would never dream of discussing it with one another. Nope. They tell me though. :-)

So is there any consistency? Any common denominator? Yep. Carrots and bananas are common, but by far the thing I hear about most are cucumbers. Short, long, wide, skinned or not, cucumber, it seems, is king.

I wonder if there should be a special section at the supermarket? Sized and graded vegetables for self abuse. Cuntcumbers, so to speak. Or perhaps cu-cum-bers.

So, has anyone got any stories for me, because, even though I searched fairly thoroughly, it seems I've never written a vege-diddling story. God only know why not! :-)

Sugasm 35

As always, your mileage may vary. Enjoy.

Fun Stuff and Announcements
I Wish That I Had Some Tits (tgp.com)
May Contest (sin.typepad.com/shauna_by_night)
Mainstream Clothing Company Makes Pornographic Online Ads (pornster.blogspot.com)

Thoughts on Sex
Food (edinerotica.blogspot.com)T and A (gentlebutfirm.blogspot.com)
Reader Question - How do YOU Masturbate? (shayssexcolumn.blogspot.com)
I Love Camel Toes (post in German) (kriminell.blogspot.com)
Busted! (wanklog.blogspot.com)
Why We Masturbate & The Endless Ways to Do It (taratainton.com)
Sex Tip - Getting Used to Condoms (seskuality.com)
Ready for Anything (alwaysarousedgirl.blogspot.com)
Spelunking the Southern Cave (greatshakes.eponym.com/blog)

BDSM and Fetish
Bondage for Beginners: Part Two, Basic Guidelines (cuntinglinguist.blogspot.com)
A Naughty Girl’s Toy Story (spankmedaddy.blogspot.com)
Floggers And Ropes And Gags - Oh My! (masterenigma.blogspot.com)
Even Money Leaves No Hope When You Have A Tiny Dicklet (phonesexsub.com)
A Different Sort Of Fetish : Long Nails (ladyevilsdungeon.com)
What An Ugly Ass Looking Tiny White Dick! (spoiledebonyprincess.com)
Discipline Spanking (darkside-journey.blogspot.com)
Missing Him (redvelvetropeburn.blogspot.com)

T and A

Sometimes, just sometimes, it's not about tits and ass. Really.

Sometimes, it's something more pure than that. More innocent, more lovely. Sometimes, just once in a while, it's about...


...a smile, or the twinkle of an eye, or the shape of a nose, or the knowing look. Sometimes, when you get beyond T&A, there's something else, something magical.






Of course, sometimes, it's ALL about tits and ass. Sometimes.

Oh dear. I haven't posted ANYTHING! Must make more time!

Sugasm #34

Tue 16th May, 06
This week’s best of the sex blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Want in Sugasm #35? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the linklist by the end of next Monday night and you’re all set.

Erotic Writing and Experiences
Lost and Found (aliferestarted.blogspot.com)
Out of Town (vivianandjack.blogspot.com)
Tara’s Private Diary: Starting the Morning Off Right (taratainton.com)
Sex Toys: Satanic and Divine (deltaofvenus.blogspot.com)
Arousal (pleasinglydebauched.blogspot.com)
Anal Fun (edinerotica.blogspot.com)
Age Before Beauty (fourstate.blogspot.com)
Ten Thousandth Blowjob (erotiterrorist.blogspot.com)
The Slutty Hostess (internetisforporn.com)
Quickie (Because I Know You’re Watching) (sabrinainstockings.com)

Audio
The Return of Bedroom Radio: Episode 10 (bedroomradio.blogspot.com)

BDSM and Fetish
Sex Questions & How to Get My Attention (alphadominablog.com)
“I Think I Love You, But What Am I So Afraid Of…” (avahsascent.blogspot.com)
Porsche Thigh High Boots (photo) (thebootcam.com)
Financial Domination (goddessjaguar.com)
Oo… la… la. Spank Me Monsieur (moonstruck.typepad.com)
Tiny Dick Contest Pictures (spoiledebonyprincess.com)

NSFW Pics

Solo Girl/Nudes/SoftcoreFine Art Nudes by Kevin Rolly (eroticandy.blogspot.com)
Black Boots - Red Panties Upskirt (upskirtr.blogspot.com)
Exclusive - Justine Joli with Laurie Wallace (tgp.com)

More Sugasm…Join the Sugasm

Sugasm 33

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Sleep

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Sugasm 32

I'm trying this out for the first time. I can't test all these links... YMMV!

Sugasm #32

Tue 2nd May, 06
This week’s best of the sex blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Want in the next one? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the linklist by the end of Wednesday night and you’re all set.

Audio
Audioblog Posts 1 and 2 (alwaysarousedgirl.blogspot.com)
First Ever Audio Post (secretsofadirtygirl.blogspot.com)

Funny / Sex News
Alas Poor Yorick, I Blew Him Well (tgp.com)
The Hooters Conspiracy (ethnorotica.com)
League of Super Friends with Benefits (shayssexcolumn.blogspot.com)
My Most Embarrassing Sex Moment (radicalvixen.com)

Thoughts on Sex, Sexy Reviews, Sex Advice
5 Senses (gentlygently.blogspot.com)
Anonymity (gentlebutfirm.blogspot.com)
Cultural Differences (sugarbank.com)
Masturbation and Ejaculatory Inevitability (onaniajournal.blogspot.com)
More Pixilated Nudity (4thegirlnextdoor.blogspot.com)
Natural Contours - Ultime (sin.typepad.com/shauna_by_night)
Sex Tip - From a Men’s Magazine (seskuality.com)
Sexual Balance (eroticvision.blogspot.com)
You Asked: What Do I Consider Cheating? (cuntinglinguist.blogspot.com)

BDSM and Fetish
Bondage Fantasies (darkside-journey.blogspot.com)
Contemplation of the Lower Navel (sabrinainstockings.com)
DVD: “And For You I Will Come As Well” (Lupus Pictures) (adelehaze.com)
Sexual Healing (aliferestarted.blogspot.com)

Erotic Writing
Climax (erotiterrorist.blogspot.com)

Dicktionary

I have a friend who was anorgasmic, the poor girl. That is, she was, until she tried frottage; a nooner scissor fight if you like, with her sex surrogate.

Confused? I hope not, but if you are, this site just might help. And if they can't help you, then maybe you can help them. I dare ya!

The Sex Dictionary arrived via Goodshit.

Oh, and for frottage... read this. Next Time.

Girl on girl

I've talked about Eros Blog before...

They just posted this. I shamelessly stole it, so I could post it too.

I probably should be ashamed, but I'm not. :-)


I'm not going to explain the attraction either. You do, or you don't :-)

A solo career...

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More on anonymity

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Anonymity

I've been thinking, of late, about anonymity.

I'm pretty interested in maintaining a screen in front of the real me on the Net, but that's not what I'm talking about here.

I mean sexual anonymity. The truly random, anonymous, zipless (Erica Jong used that term) fuck. (Everyone uses that one!)

So, despite the idea that most of us never have, and never will partake in anon. sex, is the idea interesting? Do you like the thought of taking, or being taken, without knowing who the other person is? Sometimes this works one way. For instance, this first picture indicates that perhaps one person knows what's going on.

This photo is from:

Ou Le Secret du Cabinet noir, by Faverolles – Condemned for outrages against public morals. – Destruction ordered per the Cour royale de Paris on December 21, 1822

It appears they had little in the way of a sense of humour in 1822. :-)

In other cases, as ludicrous as this very cute picture by Paul Gavarni is, perhaps neither party knows. (Well, except for the face in the window)

I kind of like the idea of someone opening a door and dragging me in for a little action, I think. I'm not at all sure about putting my genitals through a hole in the wall. That could go very wrong, very fast.

So, what do you think? Tell all. Like the pics?

Passing thought

In discussion with one of my more interesting friends, I blurted out something. Turns out it was, purely by random cosmic chance, quite good:

With age comes wisdom, luck, or a lowering of standards.
Gentlebutfirm 2006

The discussion was about girlfriends. At 17. No, not me. I'm just a little older than that. :-)

So which of them applies to you?

Crackers and cornflakes

Someone mentioned Graham crackers to me this morning. I was aware they existed, but, not being an American, that was the limit of my knowledge. until now...



...a little research... [my comments]

"All kinds of stimulating and heating substances; high-seasoned food; rich dishes; the free use of flesh; and even the excess of aliment; all, more or less -- and some to a very great degree -- increase the concupiscent [Yeah, where do I get me some of that?] excitability and sensibility of the genital organs..."

-- Sylvester Graham

[Warning: This next paragraph may induce vomiting, especially in those recommended to use carbolic. Yes]

"A remedy [for masturbation] which is almost always successful in small boys is circumcision...The operation should be performed by a surgeon without administering an anesthetic, as the brief pain attending the operation will have a salutary effect upon the mind...In females, the author has found the application of pure carbolic acid to the clitoris [See what I mean?] an excellent means of allaying the abnormal excitement. "

-- Dr. John Harvey Kellogg

[My God, these people were animals!]

The graham cracker was developed in nineteenth century America by Presbyterian minister Rev. Sylvester Graham. Conceived of as a "health food", it is more like a digestive biscuit than a cracker [So, first off, Graham crackers are not crackers. The inventor, however, was.]. Originally made solely with graham flour. Most modern "graham crackers" contain no graham flour at all and are instead made mostly of the refined, bleached white flour to which the Rev. Graham was implacably opposed.

His original "Graham bread" was the centerpiece of the diet he created to suppress what he considered unhealthy carnal urges, the source of many maladies according to Graham. He also warned that ketchup and mustard induced insanity [Only when used together]. He gained many followers and even set up boardinghouses, where his diet was observed, in New York, Boston and other cities.

Graham crackers are no longer considered health food, but have remained popular as a snack food with greater amounts of sugar, honey and other sweeteners than in the original recipe. Cinnamon is commonly added to enhance the flavor.

Graham crackers have themselves become ingredients for other snack foods, including moon pies and S'mores[ah, here we are, this is what I was really researching...], and are often crushed for use as crusts [just like you said, Tramp] in some baked goods.


"...Sylvester Graham was raised by a succession of relatives, working as a farm hand, clerk and teacher before chronic ill health [translation: either rampant, or nonexistent masturbation] led him to choose the ministry as a less stressful profession. Graham preached under the auspices of the Presbytery of Newark in New Jersey during the early 1830's, during which time he began to propound his distinctive, all-encompasing reformist ideas on diet and health...

...Beyond diet, he recommended hard mattresses [ooh, baby!], open bedroom windows [dirty bugger], chastity [poop], cold showers, loose clothing, pure water and vigorous exercise [but I thought... Oh, never mind...]. He became a well known, if controversial, lecturer on not only the Grahamite [go Graham, go Graham, go Graham...] philosophy, but physiology and anatomy and the position of the Bible [slightly to the right, methinks] on wine and meat, and he directed a special series of lectures toward African-Americans [Ohboy. I ain't touchin' that mofo]. "

While eating graham crackers recently, we were discussing the myth that they were invented to keep girls [not girls, specially...] from engaging in, uh, self-abuse. Is this true? How were they supposed to work? Didn't Graham realize he might frustrate an entire generation?

Frustrate, nothing. Health lecturer Sylvester Graham (1794-1851) was trying to save shattered lives--not just of women, but everybody who suffered from what Graham referred to variously as "venereal excess" or "aching sensibility". Graham thought intense physical desire, no matter how expressed and regardless of whether you were married or not, was guaranteed to have dire physiological consequences [So... is 'dire' bad? :-) ].

A forebear of the hairy-palms-and-blindness school of moral instruction, Graham said excessive carnal exercise would cause indigestion, headache, feebleness of circulation, pulmonary consumption, spinal diseases, epilepsy, insanity, and early death of offspring, among other things. He thought men should remain virgins until age 30 and then should make love only once a month--not at all if they were sickly. [You feeling sickly at all? No? Right, go for it.]

To control lust, Graham prescribed a special vegetarian diet, the centerpiece of which was "Graham bread," made from whole wheat flour. Graham crackers, which Graham invented in 1829, were another manifestation [spawn, you might say. Offspring, perhaps] of the same idea.

Graham attracted a fair number of followers, who opened Graham boardinghouses in New York and Boston where his dietary regimen was observed. But most people regarded him as a nut. [No shit?] He was assaulted by mobs on at least three occasions, once by butchers and bakers who thought he was going to drive them out of business. [The candlestick makers, despite giving their support to the mob violence, were busy at home, bonking] He was cranky [Did I say 'no shit?' already? No shit?] and aloof [!] and alienated even those who admired him, so much so that he gave up the lecture business in 1839 and lived out the last years of his life in relative obscurity.

His saving grace was that in many important respects he was right. Although he was a little [This word obviously requires further definition...] goofy on the question of sex, many of his ideas about health were sound. He advocated daily toothbrushing, once considered a revolutionary idea, as well as fresh air, regular bathing, exercise, and seven hours of sleep. During an era of recurring cholera epidemics he urged people to drink pure water.

Here endeth. And probably just as well!

What happened?

I can't believe it. I woke up today, and realised it had been a while since I'd added anything to the blog. A while. Five fucking months! My God!

It's like getting my virginity back again. As though I never learned how to ride a bike. As if my eyes were still good enough to thread a needle, I didn't have this stomach, and none of my hair was grey.

Today, as they say, is the first day of the rest of my life. And the blog needs it. :-)

A good friend of mine and sometimes collaborator pointed some home truths out to me, as well. Turns out that the blog entries pretty much matched those I send out in my newsletter. To the same people. Tidy huh? Neat. Alright, alright, lazy. And boring. No more.

If you want to see my new stories, have a look here. I'll just list them at the end of entries from now on.

Now where was I? Anyone got a broom?

Surveys

I'm one of those people who is always full of questions, so it should come as no surprise to you that I want to know what you think. Not just you, but as many people as possible...

This got completely out of hand. Thanks for all your work. I changed things so I could cope better.

The responses to the previous survey are here...

Innocence. Loss... and gain...


...and a whole new survey on 'Partners' is available here, and able to be answered more easily, and anonymously if you wish. I hope you don't, though. I like to know who's talking to me. As always, confidentiality assured.

Partners. Where, how, why...

You know you want to tell me! Click!


I look forward to hearing what you have to say. Feel free to add any other comments.

New Story - The Game - Part 1 - Opening Gambit

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Pieces of April- Movie Review

Link first. You're going to need that.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0311648/

Take a small indie film company, and throw something kinda wacky at them. Say a dysfunctional family. Really dysfunctional. Now make two of the family members oh, say... Oliver Platt and Katie Holmes. Yes, she of the recent Cruise attachment, pregnancy and Church of Scientology conversion. But this was before that, okay?

Okay, now it's Thanksgiving. That's a holiday I understand not one bit, but I like the idea just the same. For the first time since April (Katie) left the nest, she's inviting the rest of the family to Thanksgiving dinner at her apartment. Most of the things you can think of go wrong, and a few others besides. Somehow it fails to descend into slapstick, though the situation encourages it, and I for one applaud that.

Let me say I love the ending. But (and yes, I know I'm not supposed to begin sentence with 'but') I'm not telling you what happens.

Standout work from April's mother (Patricia Clarkson), and her younger sister (Allison Pill).

Director Peter Hedges wrote 'What's eating Gilbert Grape', and the screenplay for 'About a boy'. That might give you some idea what you're in for.

This is good stuff, and stands on its own, but I can't help but drag the whole thing down to my usual level by noting that the movie starts with Katie Holmes in her undies. How can that go wrong?